After several very bad at home dye jobs my hair had finally had enough of the torment and turned blue during a course of bleach. Look closely at the top image and you’ll see the hellish remnants of color damage I had brought onto myself. I knew there was no hope to fix this without totally frying my long hair so I went for the next reasonable alternative, cutting it all off.
When I say “cut it all off” I mean, I personally, hacked off all of my hair in the bathroom 30 minutes before attending a party. In an homage to Britney Spears, I just went for it. I knew that I would quickly regret everything I had just done, but I also wanted to stop caring about how my hair looked. There is a lot of freedom you get from going ape shit on your head with a pair of scissors.
My hair has been many various shades of red over the last decade, and all of the at home box dye had built up causing serious color damage. I had it bleached, was unhappy looking like a corn muffin, went back to red again, got tired of the maintenance, and tried to bleach again which resulted in an atrocious muted silver blue. Purposely, I left a few inches untouched by the bleach because I had the feeling it would not work and that I would have to make The Chop.
After I finished, I vowed I would no longer dye my hair. I was tired of the cost, the damage, and the upkeep. I love hot showers more than I love being a redhead. I also had not seen my natural hair in years, and was curious to see how it would look now that I was much older.
I had two emotions circling through my head over the next few weeks.
“Wow I am SO CUTE” and “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
I had my hair cut short when I was a kid, but that was a hell in itself growing up in conservative Cornland middle America. I was called all kinds of creative disturbing names by other children, and I knew since then that as a feminine passing person my hair would define me. One of my greatest fears was my then boyfriend (now fiancé) having a bad reaction to my choice to have cropped hair for a bit. I was so relieved when I called him and sent him pictures and he replied that I was still the cutest thing alive.
That was an incredible relief because now I only had to deal with my own insecurities and not feel unloveable because of a temporary hairstyle.
Men and even some women act so fucking weird about short hair. Some men act like their masculinity is being attacked by women who cut their hair short. God forbid you ever make one question his sexuality by making the autonomous decision to have less hair on your head. Don’t even let them know about the body hair….
It was not very long before people who knew my fiancé asked their ugly little questions about whether or not he still found me attractive with short hair. It was also insinuated that I was mentally unstable because I did it myself. Hey, I was just taking the matter into my own hands. No way in hell was I going to show up to a party with blue hair. However, if your partner getting a hair cut seriously affects your ability to love them, you need some Jesus or yoga in your life. It’s not that deep, it’s just hair.
I say that with ease, but it really took me an entire year to feel even okay, let alone beautiful with short hair. My personal experience with short hair had been so unpleasant, and I’ll admit I wasn’t happy all of the time with how I looked. So much of our self esteem and self worth is packed into a part of our body that is always replacing itself. I didn’t take as many selfies just because I felt flat out ugly.
That being said I want to take some time to reflect on how GOOD I LOOKED over the last year, and enjoy the transformation into not giving a fuck.
Sincerely, I looked incredible with short hair. I can see why men were concerned about my new look. These Slavic cheekbones have never looked this good and straight men should tremble since I am the prettiest boy you’re ever going to meet.
If you decide you want to get the chop the key is to keep up on regular haircuts. I looked the best right after a fresh cut and style. However, with how fast my hair grows, the style only lasts a couple weeks before it looks like I’ve reached mullet phase. The pictures above and below here were probably the best length and style through the entire growth process. This was in July/August, so not very long since the mid-February chop.
I fully enjoyed going through a Peter Pan phase. The messy just fresh out of bed look is truly my friend. I also just lucked out because my face shape is perfect for this messy length.
After a cut in early December, my hair was finally reaching a chin length bob. It was long enough to style with tools and clip it up out of my face. I hate bangs with a passion, and they look awful with my face shape. That was probably the most annoying part of growing out my hair. You will eventually go through a patch where you look ugly no matter what.
This is the most recent picture I have of my hair. Other than the obvious filter, the color is incredible. I never want to touch dye again. I’ve had about 4 or 5 haircuts over the year to get out old dye and maintain a decent style, so it would actually be a lot longer. My hair grows pretty fast, but I added hair skin and nail vitamins to my diet which noticeably speeds up the growth process. If you’re really looking to boost hair growth you can also try taking pre-natal vitamins on top of biotin, but fair warning it helps ALL of your body hair grow.
Overall, it wasn’t a bad experience. I definitely had days where I missed my hair, but thats what wigs and extensions are for. It was freeing to not constantly worry about my hair because most of the time it was already done and I could just leave the house. People do get weird about it, but you don’t need that in your life.